The Way To Get Over Your Breakup...Instantly

The Way To Get Over Your Breakup...Instantly

The Way To Get Over Your Breakup...Instantly

     Our minds have been so tragically conditioned to believe the worst in most of life's scenarios. A person'sperception and perspective are the two most powerful weapons against the evil influences of the world. And yet, we so easily yield these two defenses over to negativity in a nanosecond. Being able to put the undesirable occurrences that take place in our daily lives into perspective is key in having a happy, charismatic, and healthy attitude in life. 

     At the COMPLETION of a relationship, proper perspective will allow you to realize that you did not "breakup"...you are not "broken". You both are still whole. You have COMPLETED that relationship. You have successfully COMPLETED that portion of your life, with one of a billion people on this planet. People come into our  lives for REASONS, SEASONS, and for us to LEARN a particular LESSON. Forcing yourself to prolong this departure only means one thing, you will be preventing yourself from further growth. And the other person from their growth process as well. At this time you must ask yourself, could the desire to prolong the relationship truly be acting out of love for this person, or could it be disguised as selfishness, low self-esteem issues, or dependency?

     Realize that you are not who you think you are. We are all physical beings having a human

experience. Our entire day is but a perception. A movie. You awake each morning the director of your own motion film. You are responsible for who will be in your movie. Who will have the starring role, and who will not. How wonderfully powerful is that!

     The truth is...you can have anything in life that you choose to have. We get what we focus on. Focus on that which you desire to have in your life, and you shall summon that into your life. The perfect attitude, the perfect life, the perfect mate. There is a wonderful exercise that comes to mind. After you read this sentence I would like you to look around the room from left to right and remember everything that you see that is the color brown. Now, close your eyes and I want you to recall everything that you saw that was green. Yes I said green. Chances are, that you could recall very little or nothing at all that was green because your focus was on the color brown. We get what we focus on.

     If you close your eyes and listen to the sound of someone's voice as they are speaking to you, can you actually see them? No. You can not. You are merely using imagination and perception to see them. With this in mind you must ask yourself...is anyone other than your actually "being" ever truly "with you." When people "leave" us, be it by death, divorce, completing of a relationship, or even a vacation, if the "feelings" of loneliness do set in, all you need but do is close your eyes and draw on your imagination and perception...and there they are. How powerful the mind is! How powerful you are!

     We all need to begin to start seeing ourselves as less human beings in the physical world of selfishness and greed, and start to view ourselves as non-physical beings here to experience nothing less than pure joy and happiness at all times. Infinite joy. Joy that no other person can hand, promise, or buy for us. It is something that already exists inside of us 24 hours a day 7 days a week, just waiting for us to decide to choose it. Choose to look at a negative as a positive. Replace greed with gratitude. And look to our own selves for that bandaid of love when life decides to cut at us.

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Men and the CHANGE...

Men and the CHANGE...

It is said that many men will enter into the notorious "midlife crisis" stage, at an untimely point in his loved one's lives. There appears to be many points of view in terms of what may or may not bring on this transitional state for a man. Some professionals feel that it has nothing to do with the males age, but more to do with the age of his significant other. A woman who reaches the menopausal age can trigger her man to enter into his midlife crisis. The reason stated for this is that, when the woman marks her inability to reproduce, it will naturally set off a need in her mate, to seek out younger women who are able to reproduce. This is irregardless to the fact that he may desire children or not. There comes a desire to have a woman who is fertile. and needs to be protected from other male predators.

Another theory, is that a man is driven by challenges and a need for constant activity in order to feel whole, happy, and content. For this reason, often times we will commonly here of men with high paying technical careers and salaries, walk away from there jobs and take up playing a musical instrument or join a band. He may feel a need to go out on a whim and purchase a red hot sexy sport car for the soul purpose of attracting a younger hot sexy woman. It may spark a sudden interest in his appearance. You may notice he will begin to dress in a different style of men's clothing, purchase exercise equipment and begin working out regularly, or shave his head bald.

Men that are no longer feeling as if they are contributing in a positive way will become resentful of there partners and pull completely away from them. At this point it may seem there is absolutely nothing that there mate can do right in there eyes. The children will also suffer during this change in their father's lives. Often times it could end in a separation or divorce. A guy may suddenly feel that he no longer chooses to be married, and that he is very unhappy at home. Statics do show that most men who decide to part from the home never actually "find" or "discover" themselves, and spiral into a much unhappier life than they had previously.

Because a lot of men are smart enough to realize that it may not be the best case scenario to just pack up and leave, some do stay and try to work through their sudden emotional state of mind with their partners. It may be in the best interest of the family to make some drastic changes in order to keep the unit in tact. Perhaps a career change, playing the bass guitar in a gig, or pursuing a life long dream business could be just what the doctor ordered. And undoubtedly, it is not much of a sacrifice if it in saves the relationship, and all comes together for the greater good. In this instance everyone wins.

It all boils down to communication and sacrifice. Whether you decide to part your separate ways in order to seek happiness, or hang in there to truly understand the other persons deli ma, happiness should be your ultimate goal. There is nothing fair about forcing an individual to live in an unhappy environment. It is quite a tall tale to believe that you can marry someone and plan to live and stay together forever in sickness and in health. People should expect change,evolving, growing,failure and the possibility that your mate could become the worst being on the planet eventually. Having an open mind when entering into a relationship allows for honesty, growth and self improvement for everyone involved.

How to Get Over Losing a Loved One

Sorry for Your Loss

Suffering a loss of a loved one is by far one of the most difficult and for some, devastating events on our life experience. However, it does not have to be. Every single event, issue, problem, or occurrence that so untimely presents itself before us, can be instantaneously rectified by one simple and powerful tool... our perspective!

I remember as a very young child being tossed around one morning like a hot potato. My family members were franticly in search of a last minute babysitter for me, as they were all on their way to my grandmother's funeral. All the grief and heavy sadness that filled the room frightened and saddened me deeply as well. However, no one troubled to explain to me what had transpired. Later that afternoon, as I watched all the seemingly trillions of white crumpled balls of tissue left about the room, I over heard the adults discussing this unexpected all intrusive thing nobody likes called death.

In a much confused state, I wandered back to my room and sat alone thinking what ifs'. "Could this death thing happen to my mother someday?" "What if my mommy were to die?" I thought to myself. "When would this happen?" I cried alone for hours. Suddenly, I had an idea. "My grandmother was old when she died!" That must be the answer. You probably die when you become old. From that point on, I believed that I could keep my mommy here... with me... as long as I possibly could, if I were to prevent her from ever getting old. My secret weapon and plan was to ban myself from ever knowing my mothers age. I refused to ever put myself around her or anyone else for that matter when they discussed her age, and to not mentally acknowledge her birthdays but just eat that yummy cake.

Strikingly, I stuck to this plan throughout my adult years. Later, I managed the misfortune of learning of my dad's age, I recall thinking he's as old as the speed limit! Which then was 55. I knew he was several years older than my mother so still...not to worry. When my mother died i did not know her true age. I would only learn about her actual age being 62 as I read it in the obituary. 

I lost both of my parents a short time ago. However, losing our loved one will always seem like yesterday for us all.  I keep a level head through means of my perspective. realizing how much pain and suffering they were both in at the hands of their ailments. And how selfish I seemed for wanting them to stay here as long as I could keep them here, suffering and in pain or not. Watching them lay there, unconsciously, wordless, in their hospital beds, thinking and experiencing only God knows what. 

What if the ones who pass on jump out of their broken down physical sickly bodies doing the hoola, and shouting for joy, "Yes!...I'm finally free!" Yippy! when they pass?? We truly have no idea right? We are actually being selfish in wanting our loved ones not to leave us when they are sick, or suffering, and wanting to leave this painful, place called "the world" or "life."

From what I knew, wanting them to hang on could only be for satisfying "myself". Not for them. What would they really want in that condition? How could I know without a prior Will and Testament before my eyes? Is this truly loving them? For me to write out my own personal prescription for the time of their death? My decision was to thank my creator that my parents were no longer here to experience the surgeries, and cutting open and sewing back together, and the experimental drugs and implanted devices. 

Yes, medicine is remarkable. And all it's life saving technology. And prayer is an even more powerful life saving tool. However, being grief stricken after the prayer has been placed, and the technology has failed, gives rise to the true test of our faith, the love for those who have passed on, and for ourselves in general. Don't we have a responsibility to ourselves...the living, to put our proclaimed faith and perspective into action? It truly is about perspective.

In my perspective, I chose to call it a "Going Home Celebration" for my parents. Because that is what it truly is. I took special care and precautions not to have a single sticker on any car that read the word "Funeral." The obituary read the words "Going Home Celebration" as well. It was a happy and spectacular day. An enormous amount of police escorts, fire engines and officers every where due to the professions in the family. People ran from their homes and stopped on street corners in amazement as we drove by headed to the burial grounds. They must have thought it had been the death of a celebrity of diplomatic figure from all the commotion. 

Who knows..they may actually be looking down over us all with great sadness because we are still alive! They may be looking down on us wishing we could experience how happy they are in their new non-physical state of being. Or perhaps they are pitying us for not knowing how pressure our time is here, disappointed that we are not gripping on to each day and each other, and opening our minds to allow in the proper perspective, and living out a healthy, productive, and joy filled life.

Nikki Brown

Writer Nikki Brown is a freelance correspondent and the author of the published book, "UNCONVENTIONAL LOVE...From Relationship to Marriage"
Available at Amazon and wherever books are sold

Be sure to follow her at http://manscholars.blogspot.com/ 

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The Way To Get Over Your Breakup...Instantly

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The Way To Get Over Your Breakup...Instantly

The Way To Get Over Your Breakup...Instantly

     Our minds have been so tragically conditioned to believe the worst in most of life's scenarios. A person's perception and perspective are the two most powerful weapons against the evil influences of the world. And yet, we so easily yield these two defenses over to negativity in a nanosecond. Being able to put the undesirable occurrences that take place in our daily lives into perspective is key in having a happy, charismatic, and healthy attitude in life. 

     At the COMPLETION of a relationship, proper perspective will allow you to realize that you did not "breakup"...you are not "broken". You both are still whole. You have COMPLETED that relationship. You have successfully COMPLETED that portion of your life, with one of a billion people on this planet. People come into our  lives for REASONS, SEASONS, and for us to LEARN a particular LESSON. Forcing yourself to prolong this departure only means one thing, you will be preventing yourself from further growth. And the other person from their growth process as well. At this time you must ask yourself, could the desire to prolong the relationship truly be acting out of love for this person, or could it be disguised as selfishness, low self-esteem issues, or dependency?

     Realize that you are not who you think you are. We are all physical beings having a human

experience. Our entire day is but a perception. A movie. You awake each morning the director of your own motion film. You are responsible for who will be in your movie. Who will have the starring role, and who will not. How wonderfully powerful is that!

     The truth is...you can have anything in life that you choose to have. We get what we focus on. Focus on that which you desire to have in your life, and you shall summon that into your life. The perfect attitude, the perfect life, the perfect mate. There is a wonderful exercise that comes to mind. After you read this sentence I would like you to look around the room from left to right and remember everything that you see that is the color brown. Now, close your eyes and I want you to recall everything that you saw that was green. Yes I said green. Chances are, that you could recall very little or nothing at all that was green because your focus was on the color brown. We get what we focus on.

     If you close your eyes and listen to the sound of someone's voice as they are speaking to you, can you actually see them? No. You can not. You are merely using imagination and perception to see them. With this in mind you must ask yourself...is anyone other than your actually "being" ever truly "with you." When people "leave" us, be it by death, divorce, completing of a relationship, or even a vacation, if the "feelings" of loneliness do set in, all you need but do is close your eyes and draw on your imagination and perception...and there they are. How powerful the mind is! How powerful you are!

     We all need to begin to start seeing ourselves as less human beings in the physical world of selfishness and greed, and start to view ourselves as non-physical beings here to experience nothing less than pure joy and happiness at all times. Infinite joy. Joy that no other person can hand, promise, or buy for us. It is something that already exists inside of us 24 hours a day 7 days a week, just waiting for us to decide to choose it. Choose to look at a negative as a positive. Replace greed with gratitude. And look to our own selves for that bandaid of love when life decides to cut at us.

"How about picking up a good "Pornflix" tonight babe"?

"How about picking up a good "Pornflix" tonight babe"?

     Porn is a deliberate personality in and of itself. Once it's audience is seated, it becomes a strong and powerful speaker. A person has no idea what Porn is going to do or say, until engaged and captivated by its compelling speech. Porn can be a great tool for assisting in learning what we need to know to keep our partners sensually and sexually gratified. If your mate is or has become boring and traditional, Porn may actually prevent the chance of cheating. It all narrows down to one simple thing...PERSPECTIVE.

     Most women feel threatened and are insecure from the very existence of porn. However, Porn can be extremely exciting and rewarding in a healthy, committed, loving, and hot relationship. It can offer the opportunity to spend intimate and quality time together. It is a time to explore each others fantasy's and make choices together on what's hot and what's not. It is not an invasion of your sexual relationship with your mate. It is not another woman/man taking away your mates time or attention. A confident person, who is healthy mentally, physically and emotionally, should be able to select a good movie with their mate explore and enjoy!

     Cheating is a choice. Porn is not responsible for a person going outside of a relationship, we are the responsible party. A failing relationship generally has ample time to be salvaged if a person is paying attention. Often times good, loyal, committed men are rejected and told NO when they want sex from their mates. These starved men are going out into the world the next morning to work, grocery stores, malls, will see other Man Scholar women, and "NO" may not be in their vocabulary! Thats when you need the fear of God... not porn.

    A spouse caught whacking off alone in a room, handled in such an inviting way, can actually bring you closer. It does not necessarily mean its a deal breaker. Get out your kit gloves and start dealing. Start asking yourself questions! Am I starving my mate? Have I been making myself intimately available in this relationship? Am I taking my happily ever after for granted...AGAIN?
  

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How to Pray for Your Husband

How to pray for your husband

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